SOAKING: The power of staying with positive emotional responses.
Inner Invitations by Lucy Tierney is a universal wisdom guidebook for nurturing inner balance, healing and freedom.
An adventure awaits, as you discover the unique-to-you invitations for growth that arise from your deepest Self.
Soaking in positive emotional energy arisings.
Lucy Tierney | Author Inner Invitations
Have you noticed that painful emotions tend to be much more “sticky” than positive ones?
In Chapter Two of my book Inner Invitations, I invite readers to develop an evening practice of pausing and noticing any residue left behind by emotional responses that have occurred throughout the day.
I’m inviting you now to pause….breathe…..and notice how painful emotional experiences tend to hold your inner attention more often, and for longer, than positive experiences do.
Painful emotional responses often dominate inner awareness.
Have you noticed this?
For example, when an experience leaves us feeling threatened or misunderstood, the painful emotional residue swirls around and around, filling all our inner floor space.
It’s all we can think about.
Can you remember a recent time this happened for you?
Positive emotional responses are often downplayed.
On the flip side, when we receive a gift of affirmation, we tend to move past it very quickly. It doesn’t “stick” like the painful stuff does.
So, if someone says, ”I really respect the way you handled that situation”, our response is likely to be a brush off or a quick “thank you.”
Our culture doesn’t help us here. “Tall poppy syndrome” often leads us to downplay the gift quality of affirming emotional experiences - even to ourselves.
It would be rare for us to give that experience conscious inner attention and soak in the positive gifts of affirmation on offer.
And we are poorer for it.
Why does this matter?
One consequence of these out-of-balance default systems is that painful emotional residue often takes over and colours all of reality.
The seeds of growth are often held in experiences of inner disturbance - they are not the enemy. (In this same chapter, I explore how to compassionately hold painful or challenging emotional residue).
However, learning the power of staying with our positive emotional arisings increases our capacity for happiness.
It is a gift for our growth when we make a regular practice of giving focused attention to our positive emotional experiences. In doing so we strengthen our inner resources and bring more balance to our inner world.
Staying with the emotional warmth of being loved, praised or recognised by others, or of feeling thankful for positive experiences can expand our capacity for satisfaction and bring a broader perspective to our sense of self.
This is the practice of ‘soaking’.
The Soaking Practice
Soaking is the practice of pausing and scanning for positive emotional energy residue at the end of the day.
Emotional residue is that which lingers in your sub-conscious awareness even after the experience that gave rise to it has passed.
As you run your mind back through the day, look for experiences that hold emotional resonance, that have attracted positive inner attention in some way.
If that feeling is still accessible at the end of the day, it is part of your emotional residue.
Once you identify a positive emotional response from your day, soak in it! Stay with it. Linger with the feeling. Notice how it feels in your body. Let it take up space in you. Let it positively alter your self-perception and your mood.
What sorts of things might elicit a positive emotional response?
An affirming comment from someone.
A quiet moment in nature that elicited a sense of awe, joy or wonder.
Receiving care from someone in a way that made you feel loved.
Having your gifts or contributions mirrored back to you.
A resolution of a tension that brought a sense of relief or release.
A feeling of peace that arose in a moment of rest during a busy day.
If you cannot identify any positive emotional residue simply ask yourself:
What went well today?
What am I thankful for today?
I encourage you to try this soaking practice for five evenings in a row and notice the impact.
If you wish to, you can expand your learning and practice of pausing to notice emotional energy movements by reading Chapter Two of Inner Invitations
Kathryn Overall-Cass with Lucy Tierney (Co-Authors of Inner Invitations)
May this practice bring you greater balance, joy and inner satisfaction in your life.
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Inner Invitations: a universal wisdom
e-book for nurturing inner balance, healing and freedom.
This e-book from Lucy Tierney offers potent and practical wisdom for growth. You’ll explore insights and practices to help you find your authentic path for personal development and spiritual unfolding. Learn to exercise your innate human capacities to balance your conscious and unconscious domains in the service of freedom and healing. An adventure awaits, as you dare to go within and discover the unique-to-you invitations for growth that arise from your deepest Self.